i got my heart in a mess and of course i'm running to you, dear astrologers.
i fell inlove with a taurus at my workplace, but as he was in a very long relationship i resisted to show my feelings. i respected him a lot, thought very highly of him and didn't want to do anything that would harm him. so i decided to leave the country, because i felt stuck in an unhealthy place. we could sense the energy between us, we would be happy while talking and being at work close to each other and then look forward for the other day to come. in weekends we missed each other. of course i was told about this only after we confessed our feelings. it happened just one week before i left the country. he asked me to meet him and said he had feelings for me. i confessed also. we talked, we held hands, we stared at each other and described all the physical sensations we had in one another's presence. so, it was clear that i could not back down the offer in that another country, it was clear that he would have to split with his girlfriend if ever wanted to be with me. i left to see how strong was this attraction. and so he did split, but only after 3 months of hesitations (i guess it's his 5 retrograde planets speaking). finally after 6 months of being countries apart (but texting, mailing, chating, sending pics) we have met and were ready to make bloom the beautiful feelings between us. we would also feel each other, wake up at the same hours in the night, i even dreamed something he never told me, shared and he was amazed. we refered to each other as soul mates and said that there were bigger forces that made us come together.
and then, one month after we have met again and started the relationship hell broke loose. i was unhappy because i felt he was not over the other one. it seemed everything was reminding him of her. he knew that but never wanted to talk. we split up and then thought we actually never wanted that. now we are again apart. i just can't wrap my head and heart around it. we promised each other to give love, to communicate, to share. and yet almost nothing of all the things he promised were actually accomplished. i do not have closure. i still love him, but i lost my trust in him.
my cry for help doesn't refer to will we manage to work things out, but to 'why did we came in each others life, torn everything apart for each other (he needed to change his home, i needed to give up living abroad) and then split up?'
me: 24 02 1985 4:01 pm
he: 16 05 1980 12:08 pm
so can anyone tell me why?
we are both very broken at this time.
p.s. i don't want you to hold back anything. if you have read this, feel free to give me feedback.
Edited by celeste (06/26/12 07:29 AM)
on my way...